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Monday, May 31st, 2010

    Time Event
    1:21a
    "Daddy, you're so amazingThis is a comeback...
    "Daddy, you're so amazingThis is a comeback and
    a half
    "How much is all this sugar going to cost me?"
    "Millions," she said, and laughed
    "Still planning to drop in on The Hummingbirds
    tour?" I tried to sound just interestedNot
    particularly concerned with my almost-twenty-yearold
    daughter's love life
    573
    "No," she said, "I think that's off Only five
    words, and little ones at that, but in those five
    words I heard the different, older Illy, one who
    might in the not-so-distant future be at home in a
    business suit and pantyhose and pumps with
    practical three-quarter heels, who might wear her
    hair tied back at the nape of her neck during the
    day and perhaps chanel quilted handbag carry a briefcase down airport
    concourses instead of wearing a Gap-sack on her
    backNot an If-So-Girl any longer; you could
    strike any if from this vision
    "The whole thing, or-"
    "That remains to be seen
    "I don't mean to pry, honeyIt's just that
    enquiring Dads-"
    " - want to know, of course they do, but I can't
    help you this timeAll I know right now is that I
    still love him - or at least I think I do - and I
    miss him, but he's got to make a choice
    At this point, Pam would have asked Between you
    and the girl he's been singing with? What I asked
    was, "Are you eating?"
    She burst into peals of merry laughter
    "Answer the question, Illy
    574
    "Like a damn rolex watches for women pig!"
    "Then why aren't you out to lunch now?"
    "A bunch of us are going to have a picnic in the
    park, that's whyComplete with anthro study notes
    and FrisbeeI'm bringing the cheese and French
    breadAs long as you're eating and not brooding
    in your tent
    "Eating well, brooding moderately Her voice
    changed again, became the adult oneThe abrupt
    switches back and forth were disconcerting
    "Sometimes I lie awake a little, and then I think
    of you down thereDo you lie awake?"
    "Sometimes
    "Daddy, was marrying Mom a mistake you made? That
    she made? Or was it just an accident?"
    "It wasn't an accident and it wasn't a mistake
    Twenty-four good years, two fine daughters, borse replica and
    we're still talkingIt wasn't a mistake, Illy
    "You wouldn't change it?"
    People kept asking me that question
    "If you could go backwould you?"
    575
    I paused, but not longSometimes there's no time
    to decide what's the best answerSometimes you
    can only give the true answer
    "Sometimes I miss the old times, tooWhen things
    were less complicatedI could have
    spoken - wanted to - but kept silentSometimes
    silence is best"Dad, do people ever deserve
    second chances?"
    I thought of my own second chanceHow I had
    survived an accident that should have killed me
    And I was doing more than just hanging out, it
    seemedI felt a rush of gratitudeI can't wait to see youYou'll get an cartier tank louis official invitation
    soon
    I sat for a moment with the phone at my ear after
    she hung up, listening to the nothing"Do the day
    and let the day do you," I saidThen the dial
    576
    tone kicked in, and I decided I had one more call
    to make, after all
    viii
    This time when Alice Aucoin came to the phone, she
    sounded a lot more lively and a lot less cautious
    I thought that was a nice change
    "Alice, we never talked about a name for the
    show," I said
    "I was sort of assuming you meant to call it
    'Roses Grow from Shells,'" she said
    "It is," I said, looking out to the Florida room
    and the Gulf beyondThe water was a brilliant
    blue-white plate; I had to squint against omega watch orange the
    gl

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